Oooooh, Doppelganger week.

This week is Doppelganger week. You pick a celebrity that looks like you. Can we say awkward.

Today, Holley wrote a post about comparing yourself to other people. Oh, sister. You hit the nail on the head.

This whole week, I’ve been watching friends put up their Doppelgangers. I wanted to put one up, but I was nervous. You might ask why and I will tell you why.

I was scared about what people were going to think about the celebrity I chose. It was all in the comparing. Comparing myself to the celebrity, them comparing me to the celebrity. Me comparing myself against other people’s Doppelgangers who legitimately look like their twin. Oh, the list goes on and on.

What if they thought, “She doesn’t look anything like that!” What if they said, “Wow, she must think really highly of herself to put that smokin’ hot celebrity as her look-a-like.” I wanted to join in the fun. But I felt trapped by what people would think about me. Confession: I do this way too often. I worry about what people will think of me. I’d like to think I was that person that is so confident in themselves it exudes from their flawless pores.

I’m not.

I’m confident in some things. But most of the time I’m scared silly about what people will think. Some things don’t bother me, other times I can obsess about something for days. Let me clue you in on a little something I’ve been doing since I was a kid.

I have future conversations with people by myself.

You might not understand what I’m saying. That’s okay. It isn’t normal to hear someone say what I just said. Let me just give you an example.

I’m seeing an old friend for the first time in awhile. I’m a little nervous; feeling a little antsy. What do I do? The morning of when I’m getting ready in the shower, you can hear outside the bathroom:

“Hi, there!”
“Hey!”
“Oh wow, I haven’t seen you in forever!”
“I know, how have you been?”
“Pretty good. What are you ordering for lunch?”

Seriously, people. It is a problem. I confessed this to my sister the other day. She laughed. I laughed. It was in that moment of comic relief I realized how truly silly it is. Me practicing the conversation isn’t going to change how the situation goes or how they think about me. I just need to trust that I am enough. I am me. That is all I can offer. In those moments where I do start to worry about what someone is thinking, I just move on and proceed to pray that God would remind me of my worth in Him.

Oh dear, I am a mess. But a redeemed and beautiful mess. That’s all I can offer and that’s all He wants from me. All of my messy parts, all of my silliness, all of my quirks. Here’s to hoping I make Him chuckle at least once a day.

I will lay it all out there at this point. Here’s my Doppelganger picture. I’m trying to enjoy this silly Doppelganger month. I will not cringe. I will not worry. Woot woot!